MBTI most accurate descriptions

woolfhammer:

ESTP: super attractive physically but it’s all downhill from there. never quite know what they’re going to do next but you can probably bet it will be irresponsible. somehow still lovable. 

ESTJ: loud, logical, and get shit done — they are the warrior class of the life rpg. power stats make them unbeatable and if you encounter one, maybe just curl up and forfeit, to save time. 

ESFP: giggly little shits. fun fun fun till her daddy takes the t-bird away. great for lifting your mood, not that great at lifting your credit score. 

ESFJ: too appropriate, totally lacking in awkwardness. they’ll never forget your birthday, which will make you feel like shit when you constantly forget theirs. 

ENTP: excellent companions if you enjoy people who instantly see through all your shit. very clever and very intuitive, you can’t fool them. i suggest you invest in other friends — ones you *can* fool. 

ENTJ: impatient with people who make mistakes, namely, everyone. they’ll respect you if you stand up to them but why do that when you can run away instead. cuddle them and see what happens. i’m curious.

ENFP: too puppy to live. best suited for the profession of musical nanny. not advised for use around an open flame. 

ENFJ: way too charming and capable, maybe they should stop making everyone else look bad. prone to making other people care about stuff they didn’t want to care about. so annoying. 

ISTP: such butts. best suited for an apocalypse scenario, if no such scenario exists, they will create danger because they get bored. don’t encourage them, but don’t discourage them, as reverse psychology works too well.

ISTJ: low drama and low maintenance, best value at this price tier. best suited to actual human existence. least weird, which makes them kinda weird.

ISFP: squishy little darlings you might want to keep in your pocket, but please don’t or they will become forlorn. they notice everything, and it’s unnerving. 

ISFJ: quietly and proudly do things for others. if you have a ring you need to deliver to mordor, take an ISFJ along with you for best results. 

INTP: cute intergalactic spiders you want to hug and mistrust. prone to making you laugh but then days later you will wonder whether you were the butt of the joke. 

INTJ: major dicks and kinda proud of it. prone to being right. prone to liking trance music way too much. all the ones i’ve ever met have been unexpectedly kinky. so i guess, expectedly. 

INFP: they fall out of the sky and are raised by unicorns. if you feed one it will follow you home. they dissipate in water. 

INFJ: chameleons appropriating your emotions and going quietly mad. prone to meltdowns and needing lots of naps.

(via knownasbelen)

Isn’t it odd how much fatter a book gets when you’ve read it several times?” Mo had said…”As if something were left between the pages every time you read it. Feelings, thoughts, sounds, smells…and then, when you look at the book again many years later, you find yourself there, too, a slightly younger self, slightly different, as if the book had preserved you like a pressed flower…both strange and familiar.
Cornelia FunkeInkspell (via feellng)

(via teacoffeebooks)

An English major is much more than 32 or 36 credits including a course in Shakespeare, a course on writing before 1800, and a three-part survey of English and American lit. That’s the outer form of the endeavor. It’s what’s inside that matters. It’s the character-forming—or (dare I say?) soul-making—dimension of the pursuit that counts… The English major is, first of all, a reader… The English major reads because, as rich as the one life he has may be, one life is not enough. He reads not to see the world through the eyes of other people but effectively to become other people. What is it like to be John Milton, Jane Austen, Chinua Achebe? What is it like to be them at their best, at the top of their games?

English majors want the joy of seeing the world through the eyes of people who—let us admit it—are more sensitive, more articulate, shrewder, sharper, more alive than they themselves are. The experience of merging minds and hearts with Proust or James or Austen makes you see that there is more to the world than you had ever imagined. You see that life is bigger, sweeter, more tragic and intense—more alive with meaning than you had thought.

Real reading is reincarnation. There is no other way to put it. It is being born again into a higher form of consciousness than we ourselves possess.

In praise of the English major. Pair with Judith Butler on the value of reading and the humanities and Virginia Woolf on how to read a book. (via ablogwithaview)

(via twinkleofafadingstar)

ivorytowermind:

dominique-inique-inique:

everybody seems to think ravenclaw is a quiet place to read but i quite disagree

i mean maybe the fact that it’s so light and airy is because they need to be able to open the windows when jack blows something up while experimenting with charms in the corner

and the prefects always have their hands full because fights regularly break out over the fact that ‘post hoc ergo propter hoc is not a legitimate argument, diana!’ and ‘i can’t believe you think dorabella’s star maps are more accurate than mine! what kind of friend are you?’

and then of course there’s the divide between the ravenclaws that revere the old schools of learning and the brash new-world-new-rules ravenclaws that say ‘fuck you!’ to all magical conventions. and man, those prank wars are dangerous (especially when professor flitwick not only fails to stop them, but decides to join in on the fun)

i mean come on it’s a house of knowledge seekers that probably love to argue and theorize and experiment and have a certain amount of pride in their intelligence. things never go smoothly when you’ve got approximately 80 people all trying to be the smartest person in the room

        

#and then there are the Ravenclaws that go through existential crises every other week because of things they’re reading#WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE HAVE POTIONS HOMEWORK#I’M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHETHER OTHER MEANS OF TORTURE ARE ACTUALLY MORE ETHICAL THAN THE CRUCIATUS#AND IF NOT THEN WHY ARE THEY LEGAL#or#I AM CALLING OFF QUIDDITCH PRACTICE TODAY BECAUSE I HAVE TO THINK ABOUT WHY QUIDDITCH IS DIVIDED BY HOUSES#or I CAN’T GO TO RUNES BECAUSE I AM TOO UPSET ABOUT WITCH HUNTS IN THE MIDDLE AGES#IMAGINE WHAT THAT WOULD BE LIKE JUST IMAGINE IT#or BUT WHY IS OUR CURRENCY SO ILLOGICAL CAN’T WE FIX IT#or HOW DOES MAGIC GET PASSED DOWN BUT THEN ALSO APPEAR AT RANDOM NOBODY CAN EXPLAIN IT#IS IT IN OUR BODIES OR IN OUR MINDS OR WHAT#(just calm down and come to transfiguration okay)#I WILL NOT CALM DOWN AND I WILL NOT COME TO TRANSFIGURATION#IF YOU VANISH A THING AND CONJURE IT AGAIN IS IT THE SAME MATTER#IS IT THE SAME ESSENCE#(it’s okay. just vanish the pincushion)#IT’S NOT OKAY

(via hunterinabrowncoat)

im-not-here-out-of-free-will:

shigaretto:

sailorp00n:

rosydrops:

Cleaning
clean bathroom tips
organize your closet
how to fix a leaky faucet
how to keep a clean kitchen
removing stains from your carpet
Money
how to coupon
what to do when you can’t pay your bills
see if you’re paying too much for your cell phone bill
how to save money
How to Balance a Check Book
How to do Your Own Taxes
Health
how to take care of yourself when you’re sick
things to bring to a doctor’s appointment
what to expect from your first gynecologist appointment
how to make a doctor’s appointment
how to pick a health insurance plan
a list of stress relievers
how to get free therapy

how to remove a splinter


how to avoid a hangover

Emergency
what to do if you get pulled over by a cop
a list of hotlines in a crisis
things to keep in your car in case of an emergency

how to do the heimlich maneuver

Food
recipes that take 30 minutes or less
Yummy apple thing
Brownie in a cup
Cookie in a cup
French bread pizza
Egg tacos
panera mac n cheese recipe
different salad recipes
harry potter recipes
healthy recipes
various cookie recipes
chocolate cupcakes w/ eggless cookie dough topping
s’mores pie 
nutella hot chocolate
peanut butter nutella swirl cookies
cookie in a mug
starbucks holiday drinks
fruit leathers 
brownie in a mug
how to make ramen 1000x better
eggless cookie dough (not to bake, just to eat)
make recipes using things you already have
how to put together a very fancy cheese plate 
make different flavored lemonades
various desert recipes
make tiny chocolate chip cookies
20 dishes every cook should know
learn how to make your own tea
Macaroni and cheese in a mug
Study snacks (2)
40 on-the-go breakfast recipes
Home
what the hell is a mortgage?
first apartment essentials checklist
how to care for cacti and succulents
the care and keeping of plants 
Getting an apartment
Job
time management
create a resume
find the right career
how to pick a major

how to avoid a hangover

how to interview for a job

how to stop procrastinating

How to write cover letters
Travel
ULTIMATE PACKING LIST
Traveling for Cheap 
Travel Accessories
The Best Way to Pack a Suitcase
How To Read A Map
How to Apply For A Passport
How to Make A Travel Budget
Better You
read the news
leave your childhood traumas behind
how to quit smoking

how to get a book published


how to knit


how to use a polaroid camera


how to solve a rubik’s cube


how to stop biting your nails


how to stop procrastinating


how to stop skipping breakfast


how to stop micromanaging


how to stop avoiding asking for help


how to stop swearing constantly


how to stop being a pushover

learn another language
how to improve your self-esteem
how to sew
learn how to embroider
how to love yourself
learn how to do yoga
100 tips for life
learn how to make your own cards

I’ve been living on my own for almost 4 years now and I have like 50 tabs open.
Bless the person who put together this post, it ought to be made into a pamphlet for everyone in highschool/college.

omg

more masterposts

im-not-here-out-of-free-will:

shigaretto:

sailorp00n:

rosydrops:

Cleaning

Money

Health

Emergency

Food

Home

Job

Travel

Better You

I’ve been living on my own for almost 4 years now and I have like 50 tabs open.

Bless the person who put together this post, it ought to be made into a pamphlet for everyone in highschool/college.

omg

more masterposts

(via pocochina)

A woman who hates you is playing the pianoforte.

You have five hundred a year. From who? Five hundred what? No one knows. No one cares. You have it. It’s yours. Every year. All five hundred of it.

A charming man attempts to flirt with you. This is terrible.

You are in a garden, and you are astonished.

How To Tell If You Are In A Jane Austen Novel (via jeanpaulfarte)

(via mysweetetc)

you-wish-you-had-this-url:

chibisilverwings:

clinttbarton:

i don’t want to live in a world where i’m not allowed to enjoy both Shakespeare and Ke$ha.

Wake up in the mornin’ feel quite Hamlet-y

Grab my skull, I’m out the door, I’m gonna act real shitty

Before I leave, overthink if I’m on the right track

Cuz if I kill my uncle tonight, he ain’t comin back

I’m talkin trying to kill my foe foe
But instead kill everyone I know know
9 deaths in a row row

(via knownasbelen)

Life goal: write papers and be awesome

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